Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)
inspired by [x]
How desperate am I? You threaten my world with war. You steal a force you can’t hope to control. You talk about peace and you kill ‘cause it’s fun. You have made me very desperate. You might not be glad that you did.
The Avengers. It’s what we call ourselves, sort of like a team. “Earth’s Mighiest Heroes” type thing.
In case you weren’t aware, it’s kind of a huge deal for a spy to wear personal jewelry in public. (x)
So who wants to draw me a picture of Loki trying to seduce a rock and be my favorite person ever?
Wahaha, oh god. OH GOD.
I can’t draw for shit, but stickthisbig will be here in a few hours and I cannot promise we won’t write that story.
Loki/A Rock… would be close to the greatest pairing tag ever.
You realize we have to call it “loves me like a rock,” right?
I will be reading the hell out of it. No lie. I will leave kudos and then log out and leave guest kudos! Because bwahahahahahaha.
Jooouuu! You need to draw this! Pwetty pwease?
I’M ON IT.
Oh hey… Rock of Ages…. HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUR
In which Loki seduces a rock… with his best pick-up line (courtesy of Sparklyhowitzer)
A cool hand slides down the firm, unyielding face of the stone. Fingers brush against the softness of moss and the rough scratch of lichen. Rainwater slicks the surface, trailing down the sides of the stone to melt into the damp grass that tickles bare skin.
“Our children shall have the strength of the Earth within them,” Loki purrs, pressing his lithe body down against the stone’s hard planes. His warm tongue flicks out, a flash of red against gray as he licks at the trickling rain water. Almost imperceptibly the stone shudders, or perhaps it’s Loki himself, shaking with anticipation. He slips down the cool, wet surface of the stone until he can feel a part of it pressing against him, slick and perfectly shaped. He bites his lip, his hot entrance ready for the cold and rigid projection to enter him.
“Ah!” His thighs clench around the boulder as his weight carries him down relentlessly. He rocks back up, feeling the stone withdraw, and waits until he’s ready once more. This time the cold, hard length fills him and he moans in rapture. His forehead presses against the stone, long black hair soaked and trailing over his pale face. Soon he plants his hands on the rock’s slick surface and moves again, impaling himself over and over.
Loki’s hot breath warms the stone beneath his cheek, heating to it a semblance of life as his breathing grows ragged. His hands press against the wet stone, seeking purchase, but he slips, sending the stone deeper. He throws back his head, neck arching as he cries out, trembling as his thighs take control, shoving himself back onto the wet stone, deeper and deeper until finally he can take no more. He peaks with a strangled whimper, his release hitting the stone and mixing with the rain as he sags down, trying to catch his breath and free himself. The stone slips out of him at last, though he can barely move, his legs shaking and tired. He settles down on a smooth patch of rock.
“I think I shall call our children Golems,” he says softly, laying his head down, and sleeping. The rain continues to fall, pattering against his pale body and the stone.
claricechiarasorcha: Somehow just reminds me of Jurassic Park: The Lost World when Ian Malcolm asks Vince Vaughn’s character why he joined Greenpeace, and he made some comment along the lines of the organisation being eighty percent women.
…Loki joined Greenpeace for the trees.
…BUT HE DIDN’T STOP AT HUGGING THEM.
turtletotem: “So, I hear Christmas is coming. Have you been naughty or gneiss?”
“I could really make your earth quake, baby.”
“What do you say we go somewhere private and get a little boulder?”
(The rock’s reply: “Sorry, but I have a date with Thorium.”)
aristo-kitty: What have I done?
You’re right, it’s most unlike Loki. He surely wouldn’t make such a mistake unless he were… stoned.
aristo-kitty: Ah. So he was successful, then?
turtletotem: Let’s just say they both felt the earth move.
And they lived happily ever after. Until the movies happened. Then little baby rock learned the world could be a cruel place and trained hard to be a warrior to surpass even her father. After years of study she made the dangerous journey to Earth to seek her revenge.
The next morning Bruce stubbed his toe on the random rock sitting outside his door, shrugged and set it in the garden with the other rocks.
And that is how at least one of Loki’s children found a happy ending and true love.
I should probably go to bed.
turtletotem: Are you sure that’s how it ended? I thought I remembered Loki’s rock-child becoming a Midgardian god of combat.
sundayschoolnightmare: “You cannot deny your desires, rock. I can feel how hard you are.”
captain-snark: when I start picturing Loki having sex with mount rushmore it’s time to get the fuck off the internet.
vulgarheart: His porn is a tourguide magazine
lisu-chan: I guess their relationship is a little rocky… badum-
the-loki-army: I dub this ship: Rocki.
"I run to the high mountains
I pour my heart out to the skies
I sing of the summer song
While the sky above dance in the yellow light.
The cool breeze fools the sun above
Takes a run, wins the mighty fight.
Your light then comes to me with warmth,
A view my heart wants.
Love to me is the song you write.
The tricks you play with the endless sky
And with the icy wind you find a disguise.
You burn me like sun that burns up
In the blue abyss.
With the ink of my emotions
You write a song of Fire and Ice.”
What if it’s not everything I dreamed it would be?
Those last two where Sebastian just loses it though. He’s laughing so hard he shakes the chair and has to stop talking. OMG what a precious cupcake.
ghost stories // magic